FUNNY APOCALYPSE QUOTES

“I used to think the end of the world would be terrifying, but now I realize it’s just another excuse to eat unlimited amounts of junk food.”

“If the apocalypse comes and I’m still alive, just know that I’ve been hoarding all the toilet paper.”

“In the event of an apocalypse, I plan to survive by becoming one with Netflix and sleep deprivation.”

“The only positive thing about the apocalypse is that I won’t have to worry about forgetting to charge my phone anymore.”

“I’m pretty sure the end of the world will be started by my inability to parallel park.”

“When the apocalypse happens, I hope my survival skills include being able to catch a Wi-Fi signal.”

“If the world goes to hell in a handbasket, at least we can say we rode there in style.”

“Who needs a post-apocalyptic society when we already have self-checkout stands?”

“Apocalypse or not, I’ll still insist on using the express checkout lane with more than 10 items.”

“I wonder if Amazon delivers during the apocalypse. It’s the little things that matter, you know?”

“The apocalypse might be the only time people finally stop posting their meals on Instagram.”

“If the zombies attack, I’m taking the stairs. They can’t navigate a flight of stairs, right?”

“I’ve been training for a zombie apocalypse my whole life by trying to avoid social interaction.”

“The best thing about an apocalypse is that you can finally use all those useless survival tips you’ve read online.”

“If the world ends, my plan is to become the leader of a post-apocalyptic dance crew.” BEAUTIFUL QUOTES FRIENDS

“I can’t wait for the apocalypse just so I can use my emergency blanket as a stylish cape.”

“During the apocalypse, I hope my survival strategy includes being able to efficiently microwave frozen burritos.”

“The great thing about an apocalypse is that all those diet plans just go right out the window.”

“If the world ends, I hope I’m stranded with a bunch of cats. They seem to always land on their feet.”

“Apocalypse or not, my first plan of action is always going to be finding the nearest coffee shop.”

“If the world ends tomorrow, I’ll be the one trying to negotiate for a discount at the doomsday sale.”

“Being prepared for the apocalypse means always having a backup Netflix account.”

“I’ve been stockpiling chocolate so that if the world ends, I’ll at least have something to bribe the zombies with.”

“If the world ends, I’ll finally have time to finish my Netflix queue. Silver linings, people.”

“I’ve stocked up on paperclips, just in case they become the currency of the post-apocalyptic world.”

“If the apocalypse happens, I hope there’s still delivery pizza. The craving for a pepperoni never dies.”

“If the world ends, I’ll survive on wine, pizza, and sarcasm. It’s the holy trinity of survival.”

“In the event of an apocalypse, I hope I’ve remembered to bring my library card. Knowledge is power, after all.”