“I only drink on days that end with ‘Y’.” – Anonymous
“Alcohol! Because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad.” – Unknown
“I only drink on two occasions: when it’s my birthday and when it’s not.” – Anonymous
“In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria.” – Benjamin Franklin
“I work until beer o’clock.” – Stephen King
“I’m not an alcoholic, I just enjoy living in alcohol’s neighborhood.” – George Burns
“I only drink on days that start with a ‘T’: Tuesday, Thursday, today, and tomorrow.” – Unknown
“Drinking alcohol is not the answer, it just makes you forget the question.” – Unknown
“Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.” – Frank Sinatra
“I’m not saying alcohol is a solution to all our problems, but it does help us forget our problems for a while.” – Unknown
“I don’t need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.” – Unknown
“I drink to make other people more interesting.” – Ernest Hemingway
“I don’t have a drinking problem, except when I can’t find a drink.” – Tom Waits
“Alcohol: because no great story ever started with someone ordering a salad.” – Unknown
“My doctor told me to watch my drinking, so now I drink in front of a mirror.” – Rodney Dangerfield
“I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a wine enthusiast.” – Unknown DEEP QUOTES ABOUT LOVE SHORT
“I drink to forget that I accidentally texted my ex.” – Unknown
“They say you can’t buy happiness, but you can buy wine, and that’s kind of the same thing.” – Unknown
“I don’t always drink, but when I do, it’s after 10 a.m.” – Unknown
“I’m on a vodka diet. I’ve lost three days already.” – Unknown
“I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a drinking solution: more wine!” – Unknown
“They say ‘don’t try this at home’, so I’m coming over to your house to try it.” – Unknown
“I’m not an alcoholic, I’m a professional drinker.” – Jarvis Cocker
“Drink responsibly, don’t spill it.” – Unknown
“I’m not drunk, I just feel like everyone else is acting sober.” – Unknown
“I like to think of my body as a temple, but one that accepts all forms of worship, especially the liquid kind.” – Unknown
“I don’t need a motivational quote, I need a glass of wine.” – Unknown
“I’m not an alcoholic, I just have a really good sense of humor.” – Unknown
“I’m not saying alcohol is the answer, but it helps you to forget the question.” – Unknown
“In dog beers, I’ve only had one.” – Unknown