BORIS JOHNSON FUNNY QUOTES

“I have as much chance of becoming Prime Minister as of being reincarnated as an olive.”

“My chances of being PM are about as good as my chances of finding Elvis on Mars, or my being reincarnated as an olive.”

“My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it.”

“My speaking skills are just like my hair – unruly, uncontrollable, and often a topic of ridicule.”

“I’m as committed to Brexit as I am to not brushing my hair in the morning.”

“I have not had an affair with anyone – well, not yet.”

“My favorite Olympic discipline is the 100-meter flip-flop.”

“I can’t see any reason why we shouldn’t trust the Iranians, unless of course, they’re enriching uranium.”

“I have as much economic sense as a rubber duck, but don’t tell anyone.”

“I’m a One Nation Tory who believes in One Direction – up.”

“I may stumble upon the truth, but I quickly pick myself up and carry on as if nothing happened.”

“I love to make promises I can’t keep. It keeps me entertained.”

“I’m like a human paparazzi – always ready with a gaffe and ready to make headlines.”

“I’m the King of the political U-turn. One minute I’m going left, the next minute I’m going right. It keeps everyone on their toes.”

“My hair is not a fashion statement; it’s a source of power. The bigger the hair, the bigger the ambition.” NEW RESTAURANT OPENING QUOTES

“I have a remarkable ability to put my foot in my mouth and still keep talking.”

“I’m the master of diplomacy. Just ask all the countries I’ve offended.”

“I’m like a mini-Trump, but with better hair.”

“I have the diplomatic skills of a bull in a china shop – and I’m not just talking about my hair.”

“I believe in a free economy, free speech, and free hairstyles.”

“I may not always have a plan, but I always have a witty remark to distract everyone.”

“I have a soft spot for gaffes – they make life interesting, don’t they?”

“I’m the only one who can make being Prime Minister look like a comedy act.”

“I’ve been accused of having champagne tastes on a beer budget. I prefer to call it ambitious frugality.”

“I’m the living proof that even chaos can be entertaining.”

“My hair is like my political career: unpredictable, wild, and sometimes a complete mess.”

“I have the ability to turn any situation into a comedy sketch. It’s a gift, really.”

“I may not always know what I’m saying, but at least I’m always entertaining.”